loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
