i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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