And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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