She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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