i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
organizing the empties. That sober.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
