Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
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