We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
