another moral hangover. fuck.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Randomize
