so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
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