i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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