does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
