i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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