She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
This toilet bowl is my home.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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