do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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