YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
