well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
