So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
