All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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