She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize