Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
