his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
