party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
