so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
