I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
