Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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