what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
