theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
