No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
