According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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