dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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