I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize
