its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
