Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(440): View more from Ohio

The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"

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(479): View more from Arkansas

I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.

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(856): View more from New Jersey

there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.

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(573): View more from Missouri

She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.

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(678): View more from Georgia

I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!

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(952): View more from Minnesota

Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.

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(205): View more from Alabama

High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.

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(914): View more from New York

Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.

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