glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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