Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
he had hair everywhere except his balls
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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