Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
