angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
