This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
