areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Randomize
