I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
