There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
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