I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
