Dual....:-)
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
