so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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