dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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