didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
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