I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
