My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
