The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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