brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Randomize
