you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
