No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
